Because of our move, I had not seen a doctor for my pregnancy until around 17 weeks. It was a relief to find a doctor and know where I’d deliver and today we went in to do an ultrasound and found out the gender of the baby. I had been eagerly looking forward to this so that we could refer specifically to our baby. So that I could prepare for who it is we’d have.
What an emotional ordeal it can be: to see all the parts of a human body from within! The beating heart, the bones, and all the different body parts. When else do you ever get to see your own child with that kind of depth, all the way to the bones? I wanted to laugh and to cry at the same time.
Little Jemma had the same emotions. She couldn’t decide weather to cry from being nervous for mommy’s “safety” or laugh and be happy about what we’ve been talking about and what she has been repeating over and over. “Lyalya. Mas.” (Baby, cream.) Taps her chest for the heart and says, “stuk stuk,” for the beating of the heart. She remembered how they had put the cream on the belly and listened to the heartbeat. We have been explaining so she wouldn’t worry that they are “hurting” me in any way.
I got a kick at the way the baby would position itself and move. At one point, one leg up the other down. I’m amazed at how they can just move around and place themselves in ways we’d never think is comfortable. But then again, I always thought that as soon as we humans come out into the world we only degenerate from that point on. So it wouldn’t be a surprise if I couldn’t be comfortable in a splits position while resting away…
My mind is overwhelmed with thoughts about pregnancy, babies, the beauty of God’s creation…how different the experience is with our first child and this child. Perhaps I can say a little here and there over time… But for now, I need rest. Or warm apple pie with icecream.